Saturday, May 27, 2006

 

And then the coke sprayed out of my nose

Lawyers are sometimes asked strange questions

Jax

I just had a client ask me if he could swear an Affidavit by saying, "By the power of Greyskull."

(Link)

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Friday, May 26, 2006

 

Wow, evil... but creative evil

Look at this website for spewing out fake letters to the editor. Bugger, it's elegant (in a technological sense).

Doesn't stop the people who are doing it from being small-minded bigots.

Jax

Evil Machine

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Thursday, May 25, 2006

 

Smart Kids

Ingenous

Jax

Kids in the UK have co-opted an annoying noise sold to retailers as teenager-repellent and turned it into a ringtone.

Mosquito is a high-pitched sound "audible only to teenagers" sold by Britain's Compound Security. It is sold to shopkeepers to use as a teenager repellent -- the idea is to play it loudly in and around shops and "chase away those annoying teenagers!!!"

The kids have reportedly converted the high-pitched noise and turned it into a ringtone, which, being inaudible to grownups, can then be used to receive texts and calls in class without alerting teachers.


Read more


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Tuesday, May 23, 2006

 

Money Quote

Remember the good old days, when the CIA were the bad guys?

read the rest here


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Sunday, May 21, 2006

 

Questions for Canadians

I found this and unfortunately had to clean my monitor afterwards...

Jax

Being Canadian, I am continually shocked at the kind of questions i get asked or statements I read in the press about Canada. Britney Spears has a famous quote where, when asked about the perks of being famous, she replied "I get to go to lots of overseas places, like Canada". woah, go Britney!
When the announcement came down about the 2010 Winter Olympics to be held in Vancouver, the Tourism Vancouver website got swamped with questions, and here is a sampling of them, with their country of origin, and with some smartass replies from an unnamed source within the tourism office. Thanks to Cem (and others) for sending me this :)
Q. I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how do the plants grow? (UK)
A. We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around and watch them die.
Q. Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street? (USA)
A. Depends on how much you've been drinking.
Q. I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto; can I follow the Railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A. Sure, it's only four thousand miles; take lots of water
Q. Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada? (Sweden)
A. So it's true what they say about Swedes.
Q. It is imperative that I find the names and addresses of places to contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
A. Let's not touch this one.
Q. Are there any ATM's (cash machines) in Canada? Can you send me a list of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax? (UK)
A. What did your last slave die of?
Q. Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A. A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North . oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q. Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A. Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q. Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A. Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is, oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q. Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A. No, we don't stink.
Q. Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year-round? (Germany)
A. No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter and gatherers. Milk is illegal.

(Link)

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One more time with feeling...

This is how you trash a political opponent

Jax

Link

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Big in Japan

Tom Waits isn't the only one. Heisuke Hironaka, Fields Medal-winner for some of the most difficult mathematical proofs of all time, has appeared in advertisements and on billboards in his native country. Leo Esaki is still popular, more than 30 years after he won the Nobel Prize in physics; he didn't even have time for a brief interview with Nature because of a packed social calendar.

David Howell, chair of the East Asian Studies Department at Princeton University, explains that in Asia, "There is a perceived connection between scientific achievement—measured above all by the receipt of Nobel Prizes—and a nation's stature in the world." Nobel Prizes are a metric on par with GDP, Howell says, as a yardstick of progress.

Asians fawn over what the scientists wear and eat (like American movie stars, they often get comped), as well as their private lives—their wives are hounded for gossip on how their husbands are with the housekeeping.

Nobel Prize-winning physicist Chen Ning Yang, 82, married a 28-year-old grad student and caused more of a stir in his native China than Donald Trump did when he wed Melania. As NASA and the Russian space programs falter, the Chinese can't stop lauding their taikonauts, who orbited the Earth last year, with elaborate ceremonies, myriad titles and trips to the Hong Kong Disneyland.

(Read the rest)


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